me and my dude were talking about the the common qualities that tie our groups of friends together, and i decided that all my friends are capital-b Bitches, like people who are decidedly not mean but who are so sick of the world trying to bring them down that they’re aggressively building themselves and their loved ones up, and they have zero time or tolerance for your meaningless shit because they’re busy being Bitches
Yes, thank God you’re above all that Mycroft.
SAID JOHN BUT BITCHILY
Becoming a cold hearted bitch wasn’t really what I planned to do with my life but here I am
Listeners, are you cold? Just a little bit? Feel a thin chill on your skin?
Maybe you’ve wrapped your arms over each other, and you’re rubbing them softly but vigorously?
You’re so cold!
And now you’ve pulled your arms entirely into your shirt, trying to maximize the body heat of skin contact. You’ve pulled in your arms, and you’re rocking your body forward and back…
What about your ears and nose? So very, very cold!
Ask a friend to borrow a sweater, try that. Go on!
No one’s around! Uh-oh! You don’t actually know a single person, do you?
Your life may be a total lie.
Well, at best a fever dream.
Or someone else’s night terror.
That’s probably it.
You’re very cold.
And no one to help you. Or hear you.
Look around. All gray, windowless walls, right?
Not even a door.
How much air do you have left? How are you even breathing?
There can’t be much air left.
This message brought to you by Best Buy.
Best Buy. Conserve your oxygen!
When you feel embarrassed
then i’ll be your pride
When you need directions
then i’ll be the guide
For all time.
winter solstice & summer solstice